Saturday, September 27, 2008

He's not a bad kid

Bubba is often considered "the bad kid" because of his poor impulse control and his limited ability of knowing when to STOP doing certain things when grown ups are looking. For example, his peers know to look innocent and to hide the spit balls when an adult glances their way. Bubba, on the other hand, will do what his peers are doing if it looks like fun, but will keep on doing it no matter who is looking! Guess who gets in trouble?

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Bubba was trying to help some kids on a slide, and apparently moved something out of the way that they had not wanted moved.

"You're an idiot!" the boy stated loudly.

Bubba paused, while daddy and I gawked from below.

"That's not a nice way to say that," Bubba said softly as he scratched his head.

"You know what's not nice?" the other boy retorted "Your face. It's ugly."

"Don't say that," Bubba said, and he walked to the edge of the slide and exclaimed "Mom! Someone called my face ugly!"

I told him that if he didn't like what someone was saying to him, he could say "That's not very nice" and walk away. The parent of the other boy said nothing.

Later, me and Hubby talked to Bubba and told him how well he handled the situation. We explained further that you can disagree with someone and still talk, but if they are just saying things to hurt you, it is better to ignore them. In the past, Bubba would've yelled, hit, screamed, pushed, or something to that nature. Not because he was offended, but because he didn't know how to respond. He didn't have many responses in his bag of tricks. So this was a big deal on so many levels.

The hard part for mommy is that it is clear Bubba understands insults and they hurt his feelings. I know daddy secretly wished that Bubba had decked the kid, but I was proud of Bubba for not giving the kid any power and walking away.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

This makes me sad and proud. Mean kids...bubba is at that age when the little jerks really start saying and doing me things. I am so proud of him for "keeping his cool". It's so hard to get made fun of!!! I hated being a kid..I'm glad he has you two as parents to help him through this. You and hubby handled it well. My temper would have caused me to yell at the other mom. But I know you can't do that ....and then tell your kid to do something else. -sister

Niksmom said...

I totally understand the secret wish that he'd decked the kid. BUt I know he did the right thing and am really happy for you guys. Not only did he know he had options, he CHOSE the best one. Skill development on many levels! :-)

Stimey said...

Good for him. And lame of the other mom. I could never let my kid be that much of a jerk and not say anything. You have a good kid there.

Mrs. C said...

I read your post a couple times and didn't know what to say. I'm with your husband on the slugging, but you know, your little guy probably did the right thing. Bless his little heart.

Shep said...

I'm so proud of Bubba, A! Your hard work is paying off and Bubba's the wiser for your efforts. I hope that other kid fell off the slide :-). That's the way Karma rolls...

Paige said...

I love you dear, dear boy. You are so grown up these days and your mom and dad have worked so hard! You done good kiddo! I'll punch those other kids for you.