Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Fundamental Difference

As I have been preparing my "homeschool proposal" I have been doubting myself. One moment I am strong in my convictions, the next I am wondering if Bubba would be better off in school if I just fought harder.

Am I giving up? Did they just beat me down? I couldn't help but wonder. But then in a moment of clarity, I remembered my initial reason to homeschool and why it has been in the back of my mind since kindergarten--the school and I do not see eye to eye on a very fundamental belief.

Bubba's school believes he needs to be compliant in order to become a successful learner. I believe Bubba needs the opportunity to be a successful learner in order to understand the purpose of compliance. In other words, I believe in "accomodate and modify" on one end while remediating on the other--he'll have different points of success, but success just the same. The school appears to believe that Bubba learning how to sit still and keep his mouth shut (at whatever cost, such as picking his fingers until they are bloody nubs) is the most important lesson for him to learn.


Niksmom said...

Oh, honey, you hit right on the head when you said you believe Bubba needs to be a successful learner FIRST!

The changes I see in Nik since we've given him real opportunities to be successful are enormous.

Let it all just wash right over you and do't look back or doubt your instincts and decisions. It sure sounds like you've "fought the good fight" but it may be time to choose a different battle altogether! xoxo

Mrs. C said...

I'm just so angry to think our children are cash cows for the school districts who refuse to lift a finger to help them ... and then parents of neurotypicals pass bond issues "for the children." JMO

I am happy to help in any way I can, and could tell you a fair bit about the pluses and minuses of having children in the system. I have an autistic son in ps and one at home.

It seems to me that the schools are willing to work with your child only if he "manifests" pretty severely. Otherwise, he *must* be being manipulative or even worse!

I love homeschooling *most* days, but it would be nice if the schools were more accomodating. Now that I've been doing it a while I don't know that I *would* send him back unless there were a special class, etc. but I guess the point is it would be nice to be accomodated just a bit.

Maddy said...

Just popped over after reading your comment on Niks mom.

I think I agree with your approach, otherwise it would be purposeless. I''m so glad that there are so many mums and parents keen to go the extra mile to get the best fit possible.
Best wishes

Paige said...

If anyone can make it work Ange, you can! No doubt in my mind.

autism_anthropologist said...

So I'm reading this book Unstrange Minds by Roy Grinker. It's an anthropological approach to autism. It's more about how other societies (and our own society) perceive autism, but he has some really useful information about educational practices that are useful for children with autism and children under the PDD diagnosis in general. Since he lives near Washington DC, he was able to take advantage of the Smithsonian school, but they have a website to encourage education that integrates all of the senses and is more hands on. If you go under educators, you can get lesson plans for different grade levels. Most of these correspond with home schooling requirements. I'll put more up from the book on my (rarely updated) blog on autism research. Hope this helps.