Aw Shit

With our family eating healthier and increasing our vegetable intake along with Bubba being on laxative for his seemingly never-ending battle with bowel retention and encopresis, we have been overtaken quite literally by some stanky shit. Not only has shit production increased substantially in our household over the past week, so have the shit descriptions, shit puns, and shit analogies.

Bubba is very concerned about the possibility of slimy poop and is constantly reminding us of the "square waffle poop" he had on Superbowl Sunday. Thankfully he flushed the toilet before I was forced to act excited about his artful deposits. And doubly thankfully, daddy cleaned up the 7-year-old poopy-pants nastiness (i.e., threw the underwear in the bathroom sink where they remained for 2 days).

Bubba also asks every time I say "Daddy is in the bathroom" if daddy is in fact making a "snake poop" or a "pine cone poop." I am truthful when I reply "I have no idea and I don't want to know."

Moosie, wanting to be part of the fun has decided to go for the family title of the stankiest bowel movements. He just walks around inconspicuously with a little shuffle as Bubba scrunches his nose and says in his little 'twang,' "Whutz that schmell?" To which Moosie eagerly points to his chest, and with a big smile and wide eyes exclaims "EEEE! EEEE! EEEEE!" until someone acknowledges that he does in fact stink.

I of course am a female, so I don't shit...I eliminate waste.